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Sweet, Precious Night Slumber



Since I have 100 kids to take care of (ok 3 maybe 4 if you count Bradfo) sleep is such a precious commodity that I get a little stingy and punchy if even 10 seconds is robbed from me. Last night my head hit the pillow at 10:00 since Max decided to shhhhhhh. He woke me up at 12:30 to be fed. I put him back at 1:00 and as usual willed that child to shhhhhhh until at least 4:00.

At 3:00 I woke up. Not because Max woke up. The, (pardon the harsh phrasing but remember I get a little punchy and snippy and snappy) f-ing smoke alarm in my bedroom started chirping. No biggie I thought, I can handle a few chirps. Then the chirping kept going and going at 70 second intervals. Big booty mama drug her big booty out of bed and went downstairs looking for a battery solution, which sadly was not to be found. (AA's check, watch battery check, D's check, 23 lightbulbs check check) No 9-volt. I woke Brad up with big angry tears in my eyes and he reached up and disconnected the stupid thing and handed it to me. Did you know that it keeps chirping even when its disconnected? Even when the battery is in one room and the device is in another.?! Totally Hating Fireman Sam. I grabbed a towell and rolled it up and stashed it someplace in the garage where I am sure it continued to chirp the day away. This ordeal took 25 minutes. My head hit the pillow.

And then Max woke up.


Dookie.


The only thing that made my morning a little brighter was that Abbie wanted to play America's Next Top Model. Should I be alarmed that she already has herself some fierce poses?

Comments

Melanie said…
LOL, those DANG smoke alarms!!! Hope tonight goes better.
Since you already have a potty mouth, go ahead and watch Curb Your Enthusiasm. Larry David busted the fire alarm and then a fire started in his kitchen later on in the episode and guess what????no fire alarm...his house burned down.
Celia Fae said…
Abbie's boots are awesome. Score one for living in Utah.

Nothing makes a mom crazier than unecessarily interrupted sleep. Could you use the real words, please? I need someone else to have an r rating.
Hazen5 said…
When did you turn into such a Potty mouth? (It's funny, I like this side of you!!) Blogging sure brings out the "real" you I guess, or is it the no sleep?
AnnEE said…
She turned into a potty mouth after hanging out with Me and talking to Heid. After all, Mom DID say once, "Stop saying freaking, you might as well say the real word" Green light for me.

Plus, my hats off to Abber Dabbers for rocking an outfit that totally doesn't match. However, she looks adorable!
Unknown said…
I think I built up a collection of 3 smoke alarms in our garage before I dragged myself to Target and bought batteries. Totally relate to you!
heidiram said…
We were having smoke alarm issues as well. It would happen every night . . . about 15 minutes after putting Sarah to bed. I finally figured out that it was A. The alarm going off next to Tino's bathroom B. Those batteries were low C. The smoke alarm going off coincided with his 30 minute HOT showers. When he would open the bathroom door . . . off it went. I have since changed the smoke alarm batteries and begged and pleaded Tino to not take such hot showers since all that heat confuses the smoke alarm. (And P.S. Why on earth would anyone need to take a hot shower when outside temps are in the upper 80s and humidity is over 100%??? I don't get it!)
Jessica G. said…
OH, boy, can I ever relate! Q thought I was going nuts because I kept insisting that there was this random beeping noise going on somewhere in the house. But it is almost funny that you know exactly how far apart those beeps are...
awww.. heather. so sorry. hope you get some sleep tonight!
Nortorious said…
Why not take a hammer to the fire alarm. You should watch the first episode of this season's Curb Your Enthusiasm.
Paige said…
My first thought was a hammer too, but then Lenore stole it, which is scary. It may make a hole in your wall and it may keep chirping, but beating something feels good. Beating the husband would feel better but then you have a whole host of other issues. Which might be OK.
kelison said…
I'm sure we covered that when you were a mia maid. The lesson titled, "Appropriate Times to Cuss" Remember?

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