The Mother of Geese

***Begin Rant*** I know a lot of people who stress over the weather not being perfect and are surprised when it snows in April, May or June. Guess what people! You live in Utah! The weather is unpredictable! We have 8 seasons! Summer, Fall, Winter, Spring, but also the combination of seasons which results in sumall, finter, wring, and Sprummer. Might I suggest that rather than be angry at the poor Bob Eubanks weather men of the world surrender to the fickleness that is mother nature and embrace this beautiful place. If it bugs move to California or Arizona. ***End Rant*** For posterity's sake, I'd also like to give mad props to all the other adults (read Bradfo, Mom, Dad, Rob, Rach, and Anne Work) who wimped out on the cold hunt leaving Jason and I to man three hunts.

So are the days of our lives... For Spring Break Brad and I took the kids to Little Sahara. It was a perfect day at the dunes. Max's head almost fell off for joy with all the sand and motorcycles (motosicsucks). If I would have had cereal for lunch his poor body would not be able to take the happiness.

Abbie would not let me forget that we forgot to do her hair for crazy hair day last year. We were not going to make that mistake this year. She won 2nd place for the school and earned her class an extra nine minutes of recess. Her muse Side view Back view

or not. Warning. I hesitated recording for history the following account. It's disgusting. And I want to bleach my mind remembering it. But well, in case I develop a brain tumor and I am no longer the keeper of memories, I better write it down. I'll spare the details and just bullet the highlights. I was downstairs scrubbing the kitchen floor Max went poop on my bedroom carpet. (which is upstairs) He was playing trucks. (the big tonka yellow kind) He took the truck off roading...in what looks like mud. Poop looks like mud I had poop tire tracks all over my walls. And carpet. And a pile of Brad's clean folded laundry And heating vent. The heat was on. I threw Brad's clothes away. (sorry. It was that or replace my washer and dryer.) While I was cleaning up with my steam cleaner, tears, and sweat, Max and his sisters went to the park. The poop tire tracks came out of everything. I got a little overzealous with my excitement and spilled the tank of poop water. On my shirt. ...

Not proJECTing as in attributing his repressed thoughts to someone else but PROJECTing as in knocking out projects. I've always hated the mirror that the builders installed in our downstairs bathroom. The red bathroom has always been, oh shall we say, a source of ire in our home. Six years ago, I wanted it red. I suck at painting. The color wasn't right. I didn't apply the paint as carefully as one might hope. The color ended up like a death scene with blood splatter. He had to install moulding to correct my ceiling errors. He only finished 3 walls. It was awful and I hated it. Plus it was dark and had a stupid mirror. In his projecting mode he finished the moulding, touched up a bit, and made me a mirror. Yes made me a mirror. Spoiler Alert: He is a custom framing fool. He went to DI to get a good sized mirror then took it apart, reframed it, and painted it. (getting that mastic that attaches the mirror to the wall was a bugger. After a few attempts he closed the door and ...

When its time to put Hazen down for a nap Max likes to hop in the crib then hop out. Sweet baby Hazen has not figured out that trick so one day Max was trying to show him how to do it. Hazen is the clear winner on height and obedience, but Max beats him hands down for scrappiness and coordination. So they just looked at each other separated by a thin layer of crib mesh. Hazen giggled, they bonked heads and kissed through the mesh and it was nap time.

Precious Child does not like me to do anything with her hair. So when I showed her this hairstyle on line that involved 16 elastics and 2 ribbons and 4 eggs I was sure she would poo poo the idea. It was the most perfect hairstyle for a egg hunt in the snow.

(or finally getting around to posting pictures) I love me some St. Patrick's Day. Low Maintenance. No religious undertones for me. Just fun. After last year's unsuccessful attempt at catching the leprechaun I explained that he would probably still be holding a grudge. It was as if reading Abbie Fablehaven has taught her nothing about messing with magical creatures. The leprechaun dumped the contents of my purse and made a penny trail leading somewhere. He ate the rest of the rainbow cookies! Probably while watching Project Runway on demand. (cough cough) This mayhem. And this nonsense. It was almost as if he just took advantage of the kids not cleaning up the night before then threw some pillows around! The nerve. The penny trail led to a jumbo box of Lucky Charms which Max ate mostly by himself in 3 days.

Grandma invited the two darlings to a local production of "If you Give a Mouse a Cookie." I realize that I have officially drifted over into the mom zone in that I could not fully enjoy the play because THE MOUSE MADE SUCH A MESS. I was anxious and slightly relieved when it was over. The girls, however, cackled and smiled and had a ball watching the wickedness ensue. Faces for the dramatic scenes Faces for the thoughtful soliloquys Faces for the comedic scenes Learning about the two actors Boy and Mouse.

I mentioned a few days ago that I was annoyed at the simplified chinese spam I keep getting. I used Google Translate to find out what the comments mean (which I realize is total crazy town to do because hello, its spam, and not supposed to make any sense), but I really like this one. 灰心是動搖的開端，動搖是失敗的近鄰。.................................................. is translated to: Discouraged is the beginning of shake and shake the failure of neighbors. that is so deep, man. for the record, my neighbors do not fail in any shake and shake and I am not discouraged.

The old "Clothes tied to together" routine: I love that this prank continues on for the whole week because all of his g's are this way. I couldn't wait for him to shower this morning to discover it. In the past I have done the whole banana split for breakfast. I decided to switch it up this year by switching up their cereals. Abbie likes pops, Melia likes krispies, and Max loves denden DAMNS cereal.-golden grahms. Oh how I love it when he demands his DAMN cereal in the morning. Prank 3: Double whammy Brad: Have you seen the keys? Me: Yep, (burst out laughing) This is funny because THE KEYS ARE IN JELLO and Brad needs them to drive but also because ITS MY DADS CAR KEYS FOR HIS CAR THAT WE ARE BORROWING!!!! We'll see what else the day holds. I think the kids are too sensitive for the old water above the doorway trick. But I'll think of something. I did put a giant stuffed plush carrot for Abbie's snack (feeling a bit guilty for that one since she will probab...