The Mother of Geese

So just look at this. I have so much to do I feel like Max. Although I really like to sit in the green grass. Debbie Downer Post out. Good posts coming (birthday etc...)

For the sake of chronicle-ing...Here is what's happening with Max. Mostly when I think of Max he looks like this... He's getting his top 2 teeth and in true Danielson fashion they are woefully large for his face. One bucky boy comin' right up! But this week he is a little more like this... (He is in the destruction stage.) His toys of choice are remotes, wires, and laptops. -therefore he LOVES the basement with daddy's office. He also likes his toy cousin Hal. Yesterday on an outing in the stroller I put Max next to Hal. Max looked over at Hal, smacked him on the top of the head and smiled. Hey cousin. Currently Max is slightly physically more advanced than Hal-he is crawling, standing up, and is trying to figure out stairs. However, he all know that in a few weeks-Hal will be taller and faster than Max-who will be slower and more out of breath. Max is a patient little man. I caught Amelia trying to put her Ariel panties on him. I love the furrows on his brows. Its like...

She's not a huge fan of the surprises (sort of like her dad) I thought she would love a surprise (sort of like her mom). Here's how it went down... (a conversation with Brad and I earlier in the week) B: Wow. Look at these great specials to Oakland. I should get a ticket. Me: Yes. You should get a ticket. B: OK. I will get a ticket. Me: Pick a kid to go with you. I pick Abbie. B: Yes. I will pick Abbie and surprise her and not tell her we are going. Just surprise her. (an hour before take-off) B: Abbie, we are actually in (our takeoff city...) because Daddy is going on a trip B: Yeah. So daddy is going on a trip to visit Grandma. B: And I have an extra ticket for you to come. You are coming with me. Abbie: I don't want to go! Abbie: Mommy stop blogging this! Abbie: This is the meanest trick you've ever done to me. I don't want to leave my mommy. Mommy: You are so lucky you don't have to go to school for 2 more days! Or go to dance class! Abbie: I don't have ...

.....because nobody's getting Punk'd and I'm not doing a late April Fool's joke. I've got a semi secret. (Semi because I've told a lot of people because I STINK at secrets.) In 30 days I will be competing in my first ever I know that I (get ready for lots of quotation marks here...) don't really have "the body type" or am really "very athletic" and I have never "done any sports" and I "won't exactly be coming in first place" but it was a goal that I set a few months back and now that I am in the "final month" it is "really exciting". (and yes, I still chant "Move your big butt" in my head when I run to the pounding of the pavement.) Be impressed by me here and I promise I will not be irritated that I've only lost 4 lbs since I started training in January. phew. that feels better. I love telling secrets.

Dear my Children in the Future (aka Future Abbie, Future Amelia, Future Max), See we do stuff all the time. Your parents are super fun and ready to par-tay. Here's proof. Max is so happy to be outside. He's suchafan of the stroller. He's in it a lot! Note: Most parents walk around and stay nearby their young children just in case. I was not going to set foot in there (hello! I was wearing flip flops.) and Brad was in a corner mimicking the sheep as loud as he could. Yep, we are so cool. (ask him to do it, he does a mean imitation of a farm animal.) Good thing Amelia smiled the whole way and didn't fall off. Abbie is an old pro. She had her birthday party here last year so she was excited to run around and relive all the memories. Favorite Amelia quote: She was trying to feed the goats one kernal at a time and they were getting a little testy testy waiting. She screamed HEY! you SHARE!!! to the animals. Now she knows how it feels when I make a meal.

I quit. My house smells like chlorox. 5 days. Only 1 successful peep on the potty. A little bit of my soul died with each accident. My silent bad word allotment has been maxed out. She wins.

So day 3 of potty training. I push the drinks of water, orange juice, milk. Whatever. She holds it all morning long. We are on the potty every 15-30 minutes. She pees on the floor in the basement. (pergo so big deal). Last night while I am getting Max out of the tub she hops on the toilet and makes a download. My head nearly came off I was so excited. So she won't pee on the potty but she will do the other stuff. Or will she? Around 11:00 she starts telling me she is reedy reedy sweepy. I tell her to wait and we will put on a pull up and take a nap. About a half and hour later she wants a diaper please. I tell her we don't have any more diapers but when she is ready for a nap we will put the pull up on. She says ok and slumps up the stairs. I'm thinking I have mutiny on my hands. I am expecting to see her in a pull up with no intention of taking a nap. She comes down and shows the poop on her hands. She says she had a reedy reedy big poop. I ask her where she put it. She sa...

The puppy is still not quite house broken. We have been on the potty (at least) every 30 minutes for the last 2 days and so far have had 0 bodily fluids where they belong. Weak Smile. Oh and as far as potty currency goes: 1 potty gummy bear=meh. 1 potty color (skittles)=I yike dat one mom. 1 potty starburst=fiddling with the potty watch to make it go off every 2 minutes while we run and run to the bathroom. And she really wants to sit on my lap again.

(Will update often) After Elder Ballard's very inspiring talk yesterday I have decided to potty train Amelia and teach Max to drink from a cup today . (Between you and me do you think Elder Ballard wants me to quit the Diet Coke because it really does make me go a lot faster and get more done..hmmm) Whatever. I'm just sick of diapers and nursing. 10:00 am. Put Ariel panties on. Set microwave timer for 30 minutes. Practice what we'll do when the timer goes off. 10:17 am. Ask Brad to set the "Potty timer" watch which will play music and is cooler. 10:30 am. Microwave timer goes off. Decide to ignore it and wait for potty watch. 10:31 am. Amelia pees on floor. Put Nemo panties on. Clean carpet. Smile. 10:37 am. Potty Watch goes off. Reset. 11:07 am. Potty watch goes off again. Sit on potty. 11:15 am. Amelia goes in the corner and makes a "download". Smile. Put Winnie the Pooh panties on. 11:30 am. Sit on potty. At least she likes the potty dance. Can't...

So for those of you that just come to my blog but don't comment (I know who you are and where you are so please say hello to me!!!) maybe you think I am a bad parent to Amelia because I really don't know how to control her. Maybe you think she is bratty. Maybe you think I don't really supervise her. But the reality is, she is just a very unique little one. When I call her she either says "sorry mom" (like she is apologizing in advance for something) or she'll say "Now what?! with her hands on her hips. If I want her to stop what she is doing she gives me a passionate Oh MAN!!! (bite me Swiper). After giving Amela a bath and laying out the clothes on Saturday night I went to get Max out of the tub and ready for bed. Amelia likes to run all over and shake her booty and yell I nakey!!! so it was no real big deal for me to finish what I was doing before I get her in her PJs. It was a cold, miserable near snowy day so I was looking for Max's warm jammies. ...

So Brad pulled a fast one on me this morning. Blue screen of death? Not funny. So lame. We made a "cake" for Fireman Jason. He was amused with the sprinkles. Check out Hazen's face. In general, Abbie does not like you to mess with her food. (see St Patrick's Day 2007 ). Apparently the same can be said for the April Faux Cake. Amelia is always up for a good joke. She's been saying Spider on you Head!!! all day.

This morning I went to the gym. April Fool's! This morning I made (poured) my kids a healthy breakfast (cereal). April Fool's! It went more like this... Close your eyes... Instead we had 2 servings of fruit (banana, strawberry) 2 servings of fiber (vanilla bean, cocoa bean) and 1 1/2 servings of dairy (cream and cream) (Wait til they see dinner) They will probably head back to bed in a few minutes thanks to their sugar-induced coma. Yep, I am the new fantastic, no?

I am. I'm downstairs in the basement with Brad chatting a bit. (She has left her room during her naptime and has decided to come downstairs to see what we are up to..Don't judge me, but I have been known to lock her bedroom door sometimes to prevent this from happening.) We hear, flush! bang, flush! bang, flush! bang. *sigh* Brad and I decide to sneak upstairs to see what she's up to. I grab the camera for proof. Earlier this morning I changed the toilet paper roll. Looks like I get to do it again here. On a separate note Abbie got a snail for her fish tank to help with the cleaning of the tank. Amelia named him "Haseeim" pronounced Ha-see-yem. We have no idea where she got that from. She is so cultural isn't she? She has since changed his/her name to Hasseim: baby fish snail.

My blog turns 2 YEARS old this weekend. 342 posts and 2 years old. Not bad.

And I had so many children I didn't know what to do? But I really wanted to trim down my roses? And rake my old ground cover ? And divide my lamb's ear ? And throw down some good compost near the front door garden bed? But my 2 -year-old was putting fist-fulls of soil in my baby's ears? And then she took him for a ride in the sled? And then left him somewhere sitting in it and went to go jump on the tramp? So the 6-year-old came and sat next to him with her friend? And they were laughing and screaming EWWWWWW! And then they reported to me that he was eating deer poop? And apparently if you google "baby ate deer poop" you will find 84,300 results? And you can't stop dry heaving while he smiles "one toothed bambi breath" at you? Yeah. That was awesome. Poor Max and the Snowman Hat which will hopefully be put away until the next winter.

What do you call ten rabbits marching backwards? A receeding hareline. (Note, I stopped for a few minutes to call Nana and he made quick bizniss of his basket) More pictures later...

Dear readers- Please go here and agree with me that looks really are THAT important. Thank you.

Feed him broccoli and let him suck it all day long. But make no mistake...his burps are NASTY!

He makes me chocolate cake for dinner (Friday) He follows the high-altitude directions (who?! does that?!) He lets me put sprinkles all over it. (and crunches without any complaints with my over-sprinkling.) He cleans up the cake mess. He hides it from the kids so I don't have to share. He wraps it in wrap so it doesn't dry out. He even wraps the knife inside so I don't have to hassle myself with finding another one. He is righttherewithme on my sugar crash the day after. I Like Brad.

With no added artificial colors or sugars. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! This morning's green breakfast went better than last year . We had a great party at Grandma's last night complete with luck, cash, prizes, and great food. (I forgot to mention that we had a great big old laugh when Brad confessed that he thought Peter Pan was a leprechan and wanted Peter Pan to come and visit him and give him presents for St. Patrick's Day. We are not sure where that came from...Gary? Both Peter Pan and the leprechans are short and wear green?! who knows.)I used Wilton food coloring rather than that namby pamby food coloring set at the grocery store. Much better! Also, I have found at least a temporary solution to my high blood pressure and eye twitching as of late. I like to call it "Mommy's plan to have the girls get rid of their sense of entitlement, fighting, talking-back, sassying, procrastinating of their jobs, enough with the negative reinforcment rocks" . And the...